My personal reaction to Billy Mill's actions

Billy Mills goes through a very important growing experience in his life. He questions various aspects of it, including where it is that he belong in the world as well as, what he wanted to do. He has an internal conflict going on within his mind because he is not clear on what his purpose in life is.

When I examined the movie in a more in depth matter, I realized that I could relate to Billy Mill's internal journey more than I thought. He goes through a series of events that led to his questioning whether or not he belonged to his family, to his team, and to his university. Aside from having gone to a fraternity house and being told that they would not accept Indians in the fraternity.

 In addition to, the “misunderstanding” with the security guard on campus, which was a clear example of racism and discrimination. The one event that triggers it all is when he has Frank and a few more friends come visit him. They arrived at Pat's family's house and were immediately taken aback by everything. Pat herself and her home as a whole were the things that surprised them the most. Once in the house Billy's loved ones from the reservation looked around and criticized it. After only 10 minutes inside the house they were leaving. Billy Mills wanting to know what was going on kept questioning their actions. The other Indians kept urging Frank to come with them, while he told Billy Mills "maybe they're right, maybe we don't belong here". Mills was very taken aback by Frank's response and their behavior in general.

From that moment on, Mills had lost whatever it was that made him run, that spirit that he had inside just seemed to die out. He had 3 races following the event with the people from the reservation. Unfortunately, he lost all three and was confronted by his coach and the man who worked for the insurance company that sponsored his scholarship. These people told him that he had to win the next big race because his future might just depend on it. He had lost that freedom that he felt from running and as a result, he had lost running itself.

It is after these events that we can see what Billy Mills is working out in his mind. He feels lost and without purpose in a way, having lost races and apparently not being a good runner anymore. Billy Mills struggles with his identity and who others want him to be. The people around him seem to simply not understand him and what he is going through. He contemplates his options and decides that he wants to me in charge of his future and whatever that may bring.

Furthermore, Mills goes back to the reservation and spends time with Frank mostly who tells him "it’s not too late for you", referring to leaving the reservation and making something out of his life. Billy Mills takes his homecoming as a chance to reflect on his life and what he wants out of it. During this time he thinks about going to the Olympics, especially. On the day he receives a letter from Pat asking him to come back, he finds Frank dead after he shot himself.  He eventually realizes that he belongs to himself.