My personal reaction to Billy Mill's actions

Billy Mills goes through a very important growing experience in his life. He questions various aspects of it, including where it is that he belong in the world as well as, what he wanted to do. He has an internal conflict going on within his mind because he is not clear on what his purpose in life is.

When I examined the movie in a more in depth matter, I realized that I could relate to Billy Mill's internal journey more than I thought. He goes through a series of events that led to his questioning whether or not he belonged to his family, to his team, and to his university. Aside from having gone to a fraternity house and being told that they would not accept Indians in the fraternity.

 In addition to, the “misunderstanding” with the security guard on campus, which was a clear example of racism and discrimination. The one event that triggers it all is when he has Frank and a few more friends come visit him. They arrived at Pat's family's house and were immediately taken aback by everything. Pat herself and her home as a whole were the things that surprised them the most. Once in the house Billy's loved ones from the reservation looked around and criticized it. After only 10 minutes inside the house they were leaving. Billy Mills wanting to know what was going on kept questioning their actions. The other Indians kept urging Frank to come with them, while he told Billy Mills "maybe they're right, maybe we don't belong here". Mills was very taken aback by Frank's response and their behavior in general.

From that moment on, Mills had lost whatever it was that made him run, that spirit that he had inside just seemed to die out. He had 3 races following the event with the people from the reservation. Unfortunately, he lost all three and was confronted by his coach and the man who worked for the insurance company that sponsored his scholarship. These people told him that he had to win the next big race because his future might just depend on it. He had lost that freedom that he felt from running and as a result, he had lost running itself.

It is after these events that we can see what Billy Mills is working out in his mind. He feels lost and without purpose in a way, having lost races and apparently not being a good runner anymore. Billy Mills struggles with his identity and who others want him to be. The people around him seem to simply not understand him and what he is going through. He contemplates his options and decides that he wants to me in charge of his future and whatever that may bring.

Furthermore, Mills goes back to the reservation and spends time with Frank mostly who tells him "it’s not too late for you", referring to leaving the reservation and making something out of his life. Billy Mills takes his homecoming as a chance to reflect on his life and what he wants out of it. During this time he thinks about going to the Olympics, especially. On the day he receives a letter from Pat asking him to come back, he finds Frank dead after he shot himself.  He eventually realizes that he belongs to himself.

A Reflection on Billy Mill’s Thoughts and Actions

Billy Mills is without a doubt a very relatable character. He portrays and depicts various aspects of life that virtually everyone encounters at some point. Many of the challenges he faces are familiar to all college students who strive to better themselves in one way or another. Bullying and discrimination are only a few of the hardships Billy Mills faces. These factors play a significant role in both his external and his internal journey.

Once he leaves his home to go study at the University of Kansas, on a track and field scholarship, his external journey begins. After taking the bus ride to his destination and having a little trouble figuring out the exact location of where needed to be, he was finally there. The first thing he did upon his arrival was run on the track and train for future races. When he finished, there was an unpleasant surprise waiting for him in his dorm room. It is there that he learns that he will be sharing a room with the guy he had already had a problem with in the locker room. Later on, he goes to a formal dinner activity where he meets a few people who matter in his being there. His first race also took place and despite the fact that he won, his coach wasn’t completely satisfied with his performance. He made the decision of slowing down at the very end of the race because he did not want to embarrass the one person who could understand his situation the most, another Indian. He thought it was enough to win but he was supposed to give it his all, not take his opponent into consideration.

During his internal journey, Mills questions the way white people think and notices the difference between the ideals and values he holds dear, versus those of the people he is now surrounded with. He has a flashback about his father, who said “It’s a white world and Indian things don’t matter so much…” The viewer can share his frustration on the racism he experiences. He also reflects on why he runs and how it makes him feel, “Ever since I was a kid, running was my freedom, my happiness…” But eventually he learns that the people around him see running or track and field as a means to an end. Winning above all is what’s important, in other words being better than the one beside you. Mills considers what he is told by his coach, applies it to himself and starts to adapt to the new world he is thrust into.

 It is evident that both his external and internal journey are intermingled because he reflects on his actions and thinks about the things that take place in his life. On the other hand, Mills reflects on the events that are about to happen and this in turn affects his external journey. For example, before the end of his race, Mills thought about what he wanted the outcome to be, which affected his external journey. Moreover, the talk he later had with his coach affected how his internal journey would unravel from that point forth.